As both a parent and teacher, I can always find situations I identify with in some way or another, when reading books dealing with behaviour issues relating to teenagers. Your Defiant Teen was no exception and it was reassuring to learn that problems, both I and my friends experience with our teenage offspring, seem fairly inconsequential compared to some of the examples in the book!
Your Defiant Teen is divided into two clear parts:
The authors describe defiance as passive non-compliance involving not doing what is asked or expected, and more active verbal or physical resistance, such as swearing, threatening and challenging behaviour. However, as they explain, adults need to see the difference between defiance and normal teenage behaviour.
Any parent thinking about embarking upon this self-help programme to modify their teen’s behaviour, should read Part 1 carefully to ascertain exactly how extensive the problem is. What is learned from this section will form the groundwork for a successful programme.
I thought the multi-choice questionnaires in Chapter 1 What Defiance is extremely useful; parents can analyse and interpret the results, enabling them to have a greater understanding of the problems and their causes. A decision could also be made at this stage as to whether professional intervention is required, as would be the case of young people with Conduct Disorder or Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).
The self-help programme in Part 2 deals with specific issues including examining parenting styles, developing communication skills, negotiation, addressing defiant behaviour in school, the use of rewards and penalties. Each step can be followed rigidly as is obviously intended, but there is also the flexibility within the programme to pick out sections parents may consider more relevant.
I think Your Defiant Teen would be of great support to parents and their teenagers whether the problems are small, happening constantly or just occurring at periodic intervals. It will help whether the defiance is just at the outset or is firmly entrenched behaviour. Parents will feel reassured and not so isolated, to read about families facing similar problems.
Published by Constable Robinson, Your Defiant Teen by Russell A Barkley PhD and Arthur L Robin PhD with Christine Benton is available from Amazon. To order a copy click the link below:
