publication date: Apr 30, 2007
Teenagers
experience everything
deeply and love is no exception.
Rejection can be almost unbearably
painful and the last thing a parent should do is
dismiss their feelings. Your teen may feel
inadequate and worthless and may even feel
exploited or manipulated. The best you can do is let them know you l
ove them and are there for them.
Like anyone
losing a loved one, teens will go through periods of
shock, denial and pain before they finally come to
accept the situation and move on. Some teens will take
longer to reach this point than others but you can help them by:
- Being prepared for, and don't moan about, long phone conversations with friends – they are there for you son or daughter.
- Not trying to get them to talk if they don’t want to and don’t feel you have to hand out advice.
- Giving them time and space to work things out.
- Not criticising the ex – let your teen do that.
- Finding something you can do to demonstrate you care without intruding – for example cooking their favourite dinner.
- Boosting his/her self-esteem by reminding them how many friends they have, and how good they are at certain things.
Don't:
- Belittle her/his feelings.
- Come out with clichés like "there are plenty more fish in the sea" ... it doesn't help.
- Comment on any childish things they suddenly do.
- Criticise his or her taste.
Do:
- Give plenty of comfort and cuddles - if you are allowed to!
