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Marathon Mummy – Not a Gazelle

publication date: Nov 14, 2015
author/source: Olivia Coates

gazelleWhen you realise you are not a gazelle... Before you ask, no the running has not sent me insane. But when you are running you have time to think (mainly of all the things I like to do whilst sitting down and not running), so I made a list of all the things I like about running, a short list. 

You have time to think and be alone (any non-parents reading this, please take advantage of any opportunity to be alone because once you have children you are NEVER alone). As an additional point to the above I therefore have no one touching me, poking me, sitting on me, wiping things on me, demanding things from me or moaning at me.

What I dislike about running:  I am not a gazelle. Far from blending into the wild with all the other gazelles, I stand out like the rogue elephant in the herd. I do not prance along with ease, waving at the other runners as they pass, no, I am the elephant. I plod along, breathing heavily, looking progressively more and more like Mr Blobby. The red, sweaty-faced look is in this month I’ve heard…

Whilst running this morning, there was a pause in my music and all I could hear was the sound of my hooves hitting the pavement. I quickly turned up the volume and willed the music to start again. That, and the heavy breathing, is quickly becoming an embarrassing trait I have as a runner. I can just about deal with the above; you attempt to concentrate and pretend that you are not struggling one mile in… and then you are overtaken.

This, my friends, is I think the ultimate embarrassment. Being overtaken. And sometimes the same person does it twice… and that’s when you realise how slow you are actually running because you have been distracted by the rather odd looking dog (who looks remarkably like their owner) to your left.

Two weeks in... Gosh this is a long road I've embarked on.

Olivia (also known as Libby) will be running in the London Marathon 2016 to raise funds for Children in Crisis. You can support her efforts by donating to the charity at Virgin Money Giving.